Beauty in chaos

...the short story is "I'm back"

It hasn't been a short journey though...

The month Clark turned 2 (my last post) was the month I finally pulled all.the.way OUT of depression. Most people including myself had no idea I was struggling through what I see now as a 17 month long depression.The few that saw the signs, didn't tell me. Afterall, how do you tell someone they are depressed? (that's a whole blog post for itself)

In summary...I see beauty again. I can laugh.I can let comments roll off my back. I don't take the bounce in my step for granted. 

Caring for two kids is easier than raising one and having depression.

My family was very kind through it all. My mom who I talk to every day was someone I always looked forward to calling, just for a few minutes of adult conversation. My mother-in-law kindly (and sister-in-loves) would kidnap my little tornado for an entire morning one day a week. I am forever grateful that they pursued me and would call to say "i'm on my way to pick up Clark". Thank you Jesus for Godly family that love you through the sweet and sour times.

My husband, weathered the good, bad, and ugly with unbelievable amounts of generosity and kindness. God knew what he was doing when He gave me a patient man how has more common sense than most men I know combined. Love him.

Memories can look more beautiful as time passes... or as in my case...time has helped me see the beauty woven throughout those 17 chaotic months, of which I will write more later.

0p...my little one just started screaming. Gotta go.

The lil' Farmer turns 2!

 too many pictures! 

"Don't mess with me"

...errr...maybe it should be 

"don't mess with my coffee table" 

Even Farmers....

need their naps!

addition

fast snack

Sunflower seed + goji berries + walnuts + pecans 

+ sesame seed sticks + almonds + banana chips 

+ dried mango + cranberries = diabetic snack!

cut the mango chips 

bag in mini ziplocks

1/4 c. portions 

throw in freezer

1 explaination!

...this is how i get everything done, everyday! - clark

Vacation with a Twist

2 carry-on bags + 2 back packs +  1 child = family vacation

Few things can be a refreshing as the wonder and excitement of a child. Vacation highlights take a different twist when viewed from the eyes of a 1 year old. Here are six high points thanks to our son, Clark Allyn.

1. Sitting for hours in the airport - a DREAM come true!

2. Having to walk around construction and remodeling projects within the airport - HUGE bonus!

3. Long distances between terminals - who said that's a pain? 

4. Hours of free entertainment - thank you Tractor House

5. No car seats in the shuttle bus - SWEET!

 

6. Fire alarms in the middle of the night - what a DELIGHTFUL idea! 

The END

...of our delightfully twisted vacation! 

Operation Re-Love

Our friend Caulder works at Re-Store and told me that an entire household of old but solid furniture had just been donated. I found this $15 office table. The leather insert on the top was damaged.

* SOLD *

 

My girlfriend Nicole was coming down that week to teach me how to re-do 

furniture. The fun began with painting the base.

 Going for more of a French Country look, Nicole led the charge in popping off the table top and replacing it with plain 1'' x 6'' boards. 

I love her brilliance! I adore that girl!

Well the knobs we bought to replace the old handles didn't fit. 

New holes were drilled. - THANKS SAM!

Almost the finished product...more pictures to come!

Vs

....and this was the best part 

Life isn't about waiting ...

for the storm to pass; 

it's about learning to dance in the rain.  

This is the day which the LORD hath made; 

we will rejoice and be glad in it.

Psalms 118:24

Baking from my cupboards...

I lean on Allrecipes.com when I need to make something with what I have on hand. This week was no exception. 

Coco powder substituted for chocolate chips + a little oil instead of all butter = cookies that received high reviews 

It's a keeper!

• 1 cup butter, softened  1/2 c. butter + 1/2 canola oil
• 1 cup white sugar
• 1 cup packed brown sugar
• 2 eggs
• 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
• 3 cups all-purpose flour
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 2 teaspoons hot water
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 2 cups semisweet chocolate chips  Coco Powder - didn't measure just taste tested.
• 1 cup chopped walnuts

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
2. Cream together the butter, white sugar, and brown sugar until smooth. Beat in the eggs one at a time, then stir in the vanilla. Dissolve baking soda in hot water. Add to batter along with salt. Stir in flour, chocolate chips, and nuts. Drop by large spoonfuls onto ungreased pans.
3. Bake for about 10-14 minutes in the preheated oven

The Room

As a child, I recall that rooms in our farmhouse had a name. One room was regularly referred to as the "blue room" simply because it was painted blue.

A few months ago my husband began to refer to a room in our home as ...The Room from ....Well, I can't really write what he said in good conscious. Needless to say my husband's description was true.

The first time I heard him mumble the room's new description...I wanted to argue with him, but knew it was true. Miraculously, I made the split second decision to let the new name sink into my lil wife heart. I knew why he dubbed it with that title. When something was placed in that room....it was LOST forever! No joke.

:: a small sampling of the room :: 

Later that day, I stood in the door way staring at the random assortment of stuff, junk, and more stuff. Clearing this room was multi-layered. I took a deep breath, rolled my eyes and shut the door.

Time passed.

Something had to change and will power wasn't going to solve this problem long term.

Hello?! I knew somewhere in that room was a book I had ordered on SIMPLICITY. You can't get much better than that folks, a book about simplicity gets lost in The Room from...

http://tshoxenreider.com/organized-simplicity

Well, it's been a few months. The room is still problematic.  On the bright side, you don't have to play hopscotch when you enter because of the random stuff sitting on the floor and stacked on either side.


A few weeks ago, I had cleared enough layers of this room to rescue the book about simplicity. We're slowing working on destroying bad habits and forming new habits. It's not the fix-all book. It's not about will power. It's not about cleaning systems.

It's about intentional living. It views the first art of homemaking as discovering or knowing your "family purpose statement." What has God called your home to be? A place to cultivate deep relationships? A place for rest? A place to learn? A place to celebrate and nourish creativity? A place to learn character through work? a place to laugh?

Amazingly helpful!

Though still in process, the Weddle Family Purpose statement includes the word "rest". That probably explains why these quotes stood out to me.

"Creating a more peaceful living space doesn't happen overnight, nor does this tranquility remain forever unchanged once you've arrived at uncluttered nirvana. A peaceful home requires a change of attitude, a habit of regular maintenance and a lifelong commitment to place higher priority on relationship and events than on things."   Pg. 105

"Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful 

or believe to be beautiful." pg. 103

"Make your home a place 

where you can slow down." Pg. 103

"When you take the time to declutter 

and purge your home of the unnecessary, 

you buy time for the future to enjoy your home 

and share it with others." pg 102

Ok, so here's the picture you've all been waiting for. Now, now! Don't act disappointed. I looked. I didn't have any pre-room pictures.

Here is "the room" as it looked at 2:30 today...

Thank God, hope is not about our perfection

18 months

To my lil man, Clark Allyn

Here is what you've been up to...

- You love to go "ows-sisszs" and play
- The Doctor today just told us you have pink eye. The joys of childhood!
- You cling to two naps a day. 10-12 and 4:30-6:00.

- You love to go to Tim and Lydia's pool and JUMP in. No fear of water there.
- New vocabulary words include Bap bool (purple), tack ur (tractor), DADDA! at the top of your lungs, EEEEk, EEEK (tweet, tweet)
- You really concentrate when you shake your head and say yes or no.

- Potty training is right around the corner!
- You have become proficient at signing all done, please, thank you.
- You get pretty excited when the word - Lane, Tim, Claira, Chris, Grandma, Brandon or Mason is mentioned in a questioning tone.
- Your Dr. is pleased that you are back on the charts at 25 lbs & 32 inches in height.
- You get excited to see Grma and Grnpa....even the B side that you don't see very often. Of course, cows, tractors, cousin and good food win you over pretty quickly.
- You adore your daddy....which in itself is a pretty good Father's day gift!

Mommy's Old Blue Suitcase

I hear the truck DADDY'S TRUCK! - Clark

Mommy just said I could use her old suitcase in my room! - Clark

"THIS" is why I like the old blue suitcase SO much...to see daddy's "TUK"
 

Benefits of purging your house

Yesterday, while purging the house I ran across some basic white picture frames, two 75 cent shelves and the letter C that I'd purchased months ago ....Classic Emily problem. Inspired. Uninspired.  Inspired. Uninspired....you get the point. My inspiration comes and goes with the degree of courage I feel on any random day.

Simply put, yesterday when I saw the supplies sitting there and looked at Clark's blank wall - I felt inspired again.

My inspiration continued with a few pieces of paper + couple nail holes + 97 cents of orange paint from Hobby Lobby + a half a yard of fabric...

The end result...

"ACT JUSTLY"   " LOVE MERCY"    "WALK HUMBLY WITH YOUR GOD"

Clark is now fascinated with the wall

...urhh ....should I say a small rectangle on the wall.


Oh, and one other thing

In my whole house purge I also found my sidewalk chalk. So, before my inspiration courage left, I put a frame around the art in Clark's room...

I'm digging this house purging stuff. I like feeling courageous and also like making a lil money.

So far, I've made $107 selling random things on Craigslist.

Add dumping an entire trunk load off at the salvation army means ...

...the end is in sight!

Little drawer you add stress to my life....

Last week, I HAD it with my utensil drawer. I pulled everything out and vowed to get rid of at least a 1/3rd of the contents.

It's less stress to pull open and find what you need....

I'm pleased.

What got the boot?

...Mainly it was my dull knife set. I now own 3 knives. Loving it.

The potato peeler I've never liked and any spatula that wasn't pampered chef, went into the donate box as well.

Because, the small things of life do matter.